This is the run that never ends....

2.5 rounds around Bedok Reservoir! 2.5 X 4.3 km = 10.75km .... in 1 hour and 2 min :)

That half marathon is looking more achievable everyday.....

I blogged a while ago about how running is relaxing cos it's the only time my squirrel-like demented little brain actually stops firing on 8 different cylinders. At once.

So strangely enough, while running today, my brain was dwelling on public policy. And the ramifications thereof.

How do we truly achieve networked government? It is right that each department owns and champions certain functions. This allows for deep knowledge and advocacy by a department. Decisions that run across different departments can be reconciled by senior management. But what happens when it happens across different Ministries? I keep thinking back to the issue of hot dog stands in Singapore. Some smart soul suggested that the government permit this in Singapore. We agreed. Except that URA, the function owner, limited the timing and location of these mobile food vans to minimise disruption to the public, thereby preventing these entrepreneurs from even coming close to making a profit.

Another question : How do we ensure efficiency while giving autonomy? If too much is devolved, then economies of scale are lost. But if we take autonomy away, then we are unable to make truly effective and efficient decisions at the ground level. This could then contribute to greater efficiency at the macro level. One example this plays out in is in HR. If I don't trust line managers to judge properly, then I would impose strict conditions and rules. Yet, this might keep them from selecting and grooming the right kind of people. Where is this ideal tipping point, of pareto-optimality that allows for maximum effectiveness (rather than efficiency?)

Ok, this is getting a little too cheem. I was gonna say something about levels of power, but will leave that be for now.

Ajantis is in a daze....

Through the looking glass

Life is weird.

Caught a strange sight on Channel 8 last night. On Saturdays, there is this variety show, with one of the segments being a competition. In the past, it used to be little kids karaoke-ing their hearts out (overly made up sequinned 5 year old girls trying to act sultry... ack). Now, it's morphed into some kind of dance competition.

So the usual hip hop groups come out and do their thang. Some good, some mediocre, some average. And then suddenly, I see a young teenage couple on TV. Dressed in ballroom attire. Yes. Ballroom attire. That means tight black pants, ruffled shirt, and some frilly little dress.
They start dancing to rock around the clock, which is rock and roll and swingable. Except they are NOT dancing swing. They are dancing some weird melange of West Coast Swing and Ballroom. Given that I HATE west coast swing and posey-ball room, this of course is close to the ultimate nightmare (i exaggerate, but you get the idea). Watching them was like driving red hot nails into my eyes. And to top it off, they were doing aerials. Yes, a pair of 14 year olds doing all these lindy aerials. Aerials which few in performance lindy class have been able to do.... yet.

Ok rant over :)

Other random thoughts :
1) Read Rich Dad Poor Dad this past week cos my boss has been talking about it. It's an interesting book which provides you good food for thought. Essentially, it's saying that we should be smart about money. Let it work for us rather than the other way round. Be careful of the liabilities and assets that you are taking on. Be smart in taking risks. Be disciplined.

In other words, easy to say, but hard to do. Nevertheless, it did make me realise that I need to work harder at being financially savvy. Took a look at my stock portfolio again and realised that things could have been done differently.

2) Highlight/funniest moment of the week : Staring at footloose's boobs on the bus to Milennia Walk in a misguided attempt to raise her self-esteem. Yes, footloose, our relationship has reached a whole new level! What will H think of that? (Actually, H found it quite hilarious)

Well, time to go. Signing off.

Ajantis is peering eagerly in the mirror.

The List Monster Arrives...

Had one of those days yesterday where everything just seemed to go wrong. Was alright after
a) Unloading mental stress on H over the phone
b) Running 9km today
c) Binging on food

Speaking of binging, my favorite junk food items are :
a) KFC Bandito Meal with Cheese Fries...
b) Most forms of chocolate
c) Cocoa Flavored Loacker Wafers
d) Famous Amos Cookies
e) Hokkien Prawn Mee (no egg and bean sprouts of course)...
f) and anything with Green Tea in it.

Borrowing from footloose, here's the following question :

If you could put down whatever you're doing right now and be in another place, where would you be and what would you be doing there, what would you be eating, where would you be living, and where would you go if you wanted to write?

Put down : Politicking, worries about work, a Singapore that does not allow for variation in thought or opinion
Where would I be : Vancouver with H and Mom
What would I be doing : Ideally? Computer/video game reviewing. In reality? Some entry level job in administration :)
What would I be eating : Good Japanese food! or Singaporean food....
Where would I go if I wanted to write : One of the many great parks in Vancouver.....

sigh. 4 years to that happening!

Good night.... Ajantis in Atlantis

Random musings on a pumpkin patch

So my colleague asked me today... "How are you doing?" or something to that effect. Essentially, she wanted to know if i was getting what i wanted out of the job.

Gave her a reply that was long and rambling, as is my wont :). But her question set me thinking... so here is an attempt at a more coherent and logical answer.

I am doing fine. The job is enjoyable, and definitely a lot more varied than I imagined it to be. Things are a lot better now that my boss is definitely taking a step back and passing the buck to me to take up. More stress, but also more autonomy and more responsibility. The culture is good, and fun. Where else would one's boss challenge you to dye your hair?

There are still sources of frustration, as is normal in any job. I feel like things are not getting done fast enough, but then again, that arises from my own control-freak tendencies to micro-manage anything and get things done myself if i have to. And that's definitely not the way to go. People are adults, not kids who have to be nagged and told each and every thing to do (well, unless they show that they need to be treated like kids)

While there is a lot of autonomy, it also means a lot of uncertainty and frustration when you have to deal with departments or partners that are beyond your control. This is especially when the departments at headquarters are.... a little passive, to say the least.

And finally, the last source of frustration stems from the simple fact that I am a highly insecure person, and that I belong to a group of employees who are always compared and ranked against each other. So i find myself nit-picking everything i do, trying to figure out whether what i am doing is in line with what my boss wants (and managing a political boss is a very new experience), wondering why I am spending less time churning out papers in my current job than before (which is a ridiculous worry, since doing that would mean trying to do the work of my 3 Deputy General Managers). Not so healthy, yes.

In a nutshell, I am fine, good and happy, but I still feel like there is much to learn. Does that answer your question, LH? :) And don't worry, I don't blow up often, even if u expect me to pull a Vesuvius sometime in the near future.

On other fronts (sounding like a weatherman here), I've finally broken the 9km barrier! Ran through Simei, past ITE Simei, up to Tampines, all the way around Tampines... in 51 min. Running... is fun, even if Len and Fish and everyone else calls me crazy :)

All this running will be good training for Mongolia.. gonna be walking and riding through the Gobi Desert in August. Yup, you heard me right. This nature-phobic scaredy-cat is gonna try and trek through the Gobi Desert and not hate every moment of it :) It's expensive, but better to have tried than to always regret passing it up, no? I just hope there's enough horse-riding training before hand so that I am butt-sore and duck-legged BEFORE the trip, rather than during and after it ;)

On that note, have a good night.

ajantis in atlantis.

A musical full of cheese

PCK the musical. Yes, I went to PCK the musical with my mom.

Cheese. Pure cheese. That's the only way I can describe it. That would have been fine if it had been high-order cheese, on the order of the Producers or Hairspray. You know, like high-class Gouda.

But PCK was cheesy cheese, the kind of cheese powder that u get on your very cheesy cheetos. You get the idea. If you don't, try imagining an opening scene where PCK is dreaming about his birthday, where he is first surrounded by some prancing clowns followed by female dancers dressed as crows.

Bizarre.

The tone was also wildly uneven, with some slapschticky songs, some deadly (and i do mean deadly) earnestly schlocky songs, and some rah-rah song and dance numbers.

Add to that a cast that, to be fair, weren't all professional musical theatre people, and you have a production where it feels like a high school production with above-average production values.

Oh well. It was a surreal cheesifying experience, the climax for me being the cabaret number done to "Sing Sing Sing", with the female dancers on their backs arching their butts and crossing their legs in the air. But it's what Mom wanted for Mother's Day. So, Happy Belated Mother's Day mom! :)

Power of Two

Friends of mine know i'm a die-hard romantic deep down inside....

which is why this is one of my favorite songs at the moment. Power of Two ... by the Indigo girls

Some of my favorite lyrics in the song ...

And if we ever leave a legacy
It's that we loved each other well
Cause I've seen the shadows of so many people
Trying on the treasures of youth
But a road that's fancy and fast ends in a fatal crash
And I'm glad we got off to tell you the truth

I'm stronger than the monster beneath your bed
Smarter than the tricks played on your heart
We'll look at them together then we'll take them apart
Adding up the total of a love that's true
Multiply life by the power of two

the eloquence and poignancy and simplicity of these emotions astound me. shivers up my spine.

- Alex is a soppy romantic